Flickr.com, CCL, Mr. Kis

“Oh Father, I have sinned. It has been several weeks since my latest post.”

Lately, I have been experiencing a severe case of writers’ block, which has caused me to interrupt my usually steady flow of blog posts. For those of you that are regular followers of this blog, I sincerely apologize. I guess I could tell you that a lot has been happening in my life lately, but that does not justify not posting for such a length of time.

Still, sometime good came out of it: this morning, I started reflecting on the importance of being trustworthy and dependable in business (and personal) relationships. Recently, I have experienced several moments where people have been extremely reliable, but unfortunately also a few where they turned out to be completely the opposite.

As I was sharing some of my experiences, a friend of mine told me she deliberately picks the people she spends time with, and refuses to be associated with people that she feels are not worthy of her time and efforts.

However you define “being worth it”, I cannot help but feel there is something to be said for that statement. I have often found that I invest time and effort into someone, only to get nothing in return. Where I strongly believe in the concept of “giving before receiving”, and most of the time even in just plainly giving without expecting anything back, I have come to realize that perhaps I spend too much time investing in relationships that do not add anything to my life – often at the expense of others where I could spend more time.

Maybe it is useful for everyone to spend some time thinking about those relationships that we routinely spend time and effort on, and asking ourselves the following questions:

• What am I contributing to this person’s life ? Can I contribute more, or in a more meaningful way ?
• What am I receiving in return ? Do I get satisfaction from this relationship, or is it causing me to feel negative or frustrated ?
• What relationships do I have where I feel I could add more to the other party ? What can I do for them so they get more out of it ?
• What relationships do I have where I can make a big difference for the other party, with minimal investment from my own side ?
• Where can I make an even bigger impact on someone’s life ? What people seem most in need of my assistance right now ?

I have often found answering these questions is extremely valuable in both business and personal relationships. Being generous and giving your time, brain power or money to others can be a great and intensely rewarding experience – providing you get something back. “Something” can often be defined as much more than tangible things; often times, it is the reward of making a meaningful contribution to someone’s life, seeing someone happy or just helping them transition into another phase of life.

In business relationships, those that I have built the strongest and most enduring bonds with, those that I have assigned deals to and also those that have sent deals my way are often the kinds of people that give before they ask, and consistently add value to the relationship over a longer amount of time.

I hope this blog adds value to your life, by helping you reflect on things or bringing you a new point of view to consider. Whatever the case, just let me know if I can help you in any way, any time, anywhere.